How to Make Friends in a New City (A Guide for Expats and New Arrivals)

The first weeks in a new city are strange. Everything is new and exciting during the day, and very quiet in the evening. You do not know which neighborhood people actually go out in, you might not speak the language, and every group you find online seems to have formed years ago. Most newcomers wait for friendships to happen naturally. In a new city, they usually don’t.

The first 90 days matter more than any others. The habits you build then — where you go, which people you see every week — decide whether the city starts to feel like home or stays a place you live in. Here is a practical plan.

The mistakes that keep newcomers lonely

• Only meeting other newcomers at one-off expat events. They are useful for a first night out, but everyone is passing through and nobody is there next month.
• Trying everything once. Ten different events in ten weeks means you meet a hundred people one time each. Friendship needs repetition, not variety. (We explain why in how to make friends as an adult.)
• Waiting until you “settle in”. The longer you wait, the more your evenings fill with routines that involve nobody. Start in week one.
• Picking groups that don’t tell you the language. Showing up to a group that runs entirely in a language you don’t speak yet is a fast way to feel more isolated, not less.

A 90-day plan for a new city

Weeks 1–2: pick your anchors

Choose two recurring activities that meet every week or every two weeks: one that matches something you already love (running, climbing, board games, a sport) and one built for meeting people (a language exchange, a social dinner, a volunteering shift). Check three things before you join: when it meets, which language it runs in, and whether the people who sign up actually come.

Weeks 3–6: show up three times

Go to each anchor at least three times before deciding anything. Arrive early, stay for the drink after, and learn three names. By the third visit you will notice the regulars — those are the people to get to know.

Weeks 7–12: make the first invitation

Suggest something small to one or two regulars: food after the session, a weekend walk, a market. People who have lived in a city for years are often happy to show it to someone new, and other newcomers are waiting for exactly that invitation.

Where newcomers actually make friends

• Run clubs and walking groups. Low pressure, side by side, and almost always a coffee after. Many cities now have several a week. If there is none near you, start one.
• Language exchanges. You learn the local language, locals practise yours, and both sides have a reason to come back every week.
• Climbing gyms and team sports. Built-in regulars, built-in reasons to talk.
• Supper clubs and board-game nights. Small groups, long conversations.
• Volunteering. A fixed shift with the same people and a shared purpose.

If you don’t speak the language yet

Look for groups that say clearly which language they run in, and mix one English-friendly anchor with one where you practise the local language. Telling people “I’m learning, please speak slowly” is one of the best icebreakers there is — people love to help.

Moved to Warsaw?

Warsaw has a large international community and a fast-growing club scene, from run clubs to language exchanges. We wrote a dedicated guide to the best ways to meet people in Warsaw.

How Cercle helps newcomers

Cercle lists clubs by precise activity, city and language, so you know before you go what the group does and which language it runs in. Every club shows its real show-up rate, so you can pick groups where people actually come — the ones where your three visits will turn into something. Joining a club is free.

A new city stops feeling foreign the day someone says your name when you walk in. Pick two anchors, go three times, make the first invitation. Find your first club on Cercle.